How to grow your Fuck Off Fund AKA Vex Money

Fuck Off Fund.

That is a phrase I will certainly add to my vocabulary but chances are that I will call it the F-Off Fund since I am currently trying not to use swear words when I speak.

I woke up a few days ago to a message from my best friend that hard this link in it. It's Eromo, I always open his links (I can't say the same for most of my other contacts). After reading the piece (and you certainly should read it too), I had a big smile on my face.

See, I have never known of the this term but being Nigerian, my mind found something that I could almost equate it to - "Vex Money".

Growing up, "Vex Money" was a course in the street school of survival that saved you from being beat up, raped, insulted or trodden over by your boyfriend/fiance/lover. I learned that for every time I paid a visit to a guy, I was important to have enough money in my pockets to take me back home. The idea was to always be able to go back home and never be so stranded that I would put up with uncomfortable treatment just because I could not afford to leave, literally. In random conversations, I have seen how that concept has saved many girls (and sometimes, ruined them. but that is a conversation for another day). Kudos to whoever came up with it. 

After reading the piece and relating it to recent events in my life, I realised that the fuck off fund goes way beyond preserving a girl from sexual harassment. It is something every human should be aware of, learn and practice. So I came up with a few tips to grow your fuck off fund.

1. Save:

This is different from your regular saving that may or may not have a set purpose (you are better off saving for a purpose though...it's easier). Save that little extra money that is solely for the purpose of getting back home or, in more life forming terms, helping you say no, walk away, survive and re-launch.

2. Live within (or slightly less) than you means:

That is financial wisdom 101. You can afford it doesn't always mean you should spend on it. Sometimes, when you see those amazing things that you want but don't need, close your eyes and say "get thee behind me".

3. Do not over react:

Sometimes, because we have "vex money", we tend to pack up and leave at the slightest discomfort. We completely throw the idea of resolution out the window. If you do that often enough, no matter how much you have stacked up, you will run out sooner than later. So help yourself understand the situations that are truly "vex money worthy" and use your stash at those times only.